I can’t stop looking at my private parts. Yes, I have been Vajazzled!
For those of you unfamiliar with the sparkling craze known as Vajazzling that is taking place in city salons around the world, it involves the brisk hair removal otherwise known as a Brazilian wax and then the application of crystals to your pubic area.
Why, I hear you ask. Well the obvious reason is superficial beautification but little did I know that having pink crystals in a heart shape placed on my bits would provoke so much thought, action and questioning. This Vajazzling process for me has sprouted many conversations with friends about genital appearance, attitudes and cultural issues.
It is no secret that many women are highly critical of their own bodies and often the bodies of women around them. As a result we see the increase of eating disorders, emotional turmoil, media lies, body obsession and an intense lack of healthy self exploration both physically and emotionally.
A huge part of self acceptance comes from educating ourselves about our own bodies and feeling as if we can share our questions and insecurities in a supportive space. I would like to bet that many women have no idea what their vagina looks like, they may have a great deal of shame or guilt about self exploration. From a physical, emotional, medical, sexual and spiritual point of view self exploration and body awareness is an essential practice. If Vajazzling ignites the importance of self exploration and communication between women and their partners, friends, health care practitioners then I am in favor of the sparkles.
Contrary to popular belief I am not entirely in love with myself. Yes I am going to own my rampant insecurities. The path to self love is one I travel everyday. As a performer I bare my skin in front of crowds of people often but it is frequently both a challenge and an enlightening experience for me. Part of sharing my art in the ways that I do is a process towards openly inspiring healing for myself and women around me.
It is a very big thing for me to lay on a bed in front of a beautiful Japanese woman (or anyone for that matter) legs spread, staring up at a the overhead chandelier in a swank Tokyo salon, spotlight on my bits, biting my knuckles nervously. Getting a Brazilian wax is certainly not for the fainthearted or the shy, while I have experienced many I always find them confronting, almost invasive. And yet I simultaneously find the process supportive of personal growth, freedom and self love. The introspection and release that comes from baring all and having it ripped away is a step, for me, on the path to self appreciation and acceptance. Healing.
Many of you may question that logic, might even find it ridiculous. If I truly accepted myself wouldn’t I just leave things the way they are. Well, you have a point but I believe self acceptance is about exactly that, SELF. I personally prefer a hair free zone for costume wearing and sensory purposes. I am not pressured in any way by my partner, friends or society to go bare. This is my personal preference.
I am not going to deny the fact that I was thinking how inexcusable it is that some women like myself are getting crystals stuck to their bits in fancy salons while many women in the world are battling with horrific issues involving their genitals, sexual rights and general safety. The Vajazzling process ironically has ignited my awareness of the stark contrast that exists around the world involving female genital related practices.
One friend suggested that instead of wasting money on Vajazzling funds might better be directed to organizations that work towards the eradication of such practices as genital mutilation. I do agree. If you are interested in further education on these horrific practices please visit sites such as FORWARD and the World Health Organization.
It is estimated that approximately 100-140 million African women have undergone FGM worldwide and each year, a further 3 million girls are estimated to be at risk of the practice in Africa alone. Most of them live in African countries, a few in the Middle East and Asian countries, and increasingly in Europe, Australia, New Zealand, the United States of America and Canada.
Collective Female Consciousness
Many people have asked if I did it “for my man” and there are a lot of articles online suggesting we women get dazzling for the man in our lives. Although I have to say in my case the issues and questions raised by the Vajazzling experience have all come from women and have not been of a sexual nature at all. Rather there has been a collective gathering and an obvious concern for female care, discussions on preference, giggles about personal experiences, talk of medical issues, thoughts raised about self acceptance, concern for archaic attitudes and practices, appreciation for the openness we share and the urge to play our part in supporting female health around the world.
So what started out as a fun present gifted to me from a dear friend has turned into a desire to openly share and educate, to delve into the underbelly of female insecurities, taboos and cultural atrocities. To bring to the surface questions, eradicate shame and appreciate the sacred beauty that we are given; with or without the crystals.
Vajazzle Alternative. Photo by djmalone2003
I have been asked SO many questions about my recent Vajazzling experience so I thought I would answer them here.
Does your man like it?
My husband is an awesome man, he loves me and my body very much and supports anything I choose to do. He couldn’t care less if the crystals are there or not but he did think it was cute and enjoyed my fascination with it.
Does it itch?
No. I had my Vajazzling done at Boudoir in Tokyo and the crystals they apply look just like these Vajazzling kits. Maybe if you are Christina Aguilera or Lady Gaga you get a whole crotch plastered with Swarovskis and holographic glitter but sounds kind of uncomfortable to me.
Does it hurt?
No, the actual sticking on of the crystals creates no sensation. The Brazilian wax is an unsettling experience, although some find it pain free I am always in quite a bit of pain. Some salons recommend taking pain killers before going in for the process, but I am not a fan of medication so I can deal with the pain.
Can you show me?
Ha ha, I joked that I did a photoshoot, there are no photos of me but there are some photos of Vajazzled parts here. All of my friends who have asked me have seen it. The Vajazzle pattern is placed just below the underwear line so no chance of being busted for indecent exposure.
How long do the crystals stay on?
Well that all depends on how “careful” you are. Usually about a week. Much like a spray tan or any of those other crazy, temporary things we ladies do to make ourselves look good/have some fun/fit in/follow trends/try to feel better about ourselves.
Some link love for the purpose of awareness raising, in various ways.
If you are at work some of these links and videos may not be appropriate. If you have a problem with female private parts you are going to need to get over it!
If you have a vagina or you are into them at all please watch this!
Vajazzle Me Barbie: The New Vajazzling Barbie Doll
The comments on this video are interesting. What do you think?
The Great Wall of Vagina
40 other ways to say Vajayjay. Pink Taco? That’s not pretty.
Forget the Vajazzle now there are Vagacials…facials for down there.
Tantric Yoni Massage. A sacred practice for pleasure.
Scared Womens Circles A guide to creating your own women’s spirituality group
VSE – Vaginal Self Examination
The Vagina Shrine…fertility festival in Japan
The Grotesque Pussy in Margaret Cho’s Stand-up Performances
I love my vagina -In countries like Taiwan, women are still busy fighting for their rights instead of exploring their inner desires.
Interested to read your thoughts, stories or informative links.